It began!

This kind of effort!

It's something that won't please me!

I don't want to do it at all!

What's the point of doing it!

In the blink of an eye!

Two months of serialization have passed!

When you see me saying this!

It's probably going to be serialized for four months!

Because this is a village draft!

Too troublesome!

Just thinking about it gives me a headache!

I can only write until 10 PM today!

I have to cook again!

That's it!

Sigh!

Life is so bitter!

I can't accept it!

That's it!

I'm a living person!

It's actually not for myself!

I'm not even willing to do it for myself!

Why doesn't anyone like me!

Because I don't like myself!

I've realized it now!

Just thinking about it makes me uncomfortable!

The pressure is too great!

Working is too tiring!

And I'm lazy!

It's not as easy as typing on the keyboard!

Typing on the keyboard!

For me, this kind of thing!

It's very easy!

And it's very enjoyable!

The so-called novel writing!

It's to write until I throw up!

And then eat it back!

That's the kind of feeling I want!

I'm just saying it casually!

That's life!

How painful is that!

Let the pain continue to spread!

Keep going!

No way!

I have an opinion!

There's no other way!

I'm under the eaves!

How can I not lower my head!

That's it!

Just thinking about it makes me uncomfortable!

It can't be like this!

I might not even last a week!

I'm going to look for a job!

Of course!

There's a delay!

This is a stockpile!

Today is July 1st!

It might be July 15th!

I'm going to start work!

Sigh, the pace is so fast!

How can I get it!

I can't take it!

I can't get used to it!

Well, today!

That's not good!

I'm going crazy!

It's because I'm too serious!

But thinking!

It's just a formality!

I'm going crazy just like that!

That's it!

Actually, this is not good!

There's good and bad!

This is also given!

My ability to criticize!

How is society!

It's definitely not from the books!

It's also not from the Internet!

Real society is something you have to experience for yourself!

That's it!

I'm not talking about the underworld!

I'm just telling the truth!

I don't think the economic development is that good!

The total amount is relatively limited!

Actually, this is dividing the cake!

But!

I'm not dividing it!!

It's always about the economy!

What's the use!

A line!

My salary!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not making this up!

My salary isn't going to be deducted or used!

Even if I get it!!

It's credited to my card!

It's only 2,000!

Am I born unlucky?!

I'm a hindrance to the economic development!

I have nothing to say!

So!

This kind of news!

I won't read it!

It's not much use even if I read it!

It's just a waste of time!

Whether the economy is developing or not!

From my personal point of view, it's not good!

Of course!

It's not that my salary has increased!

Society is developing well!

My salary is also at the poverty line!

It's considered so!

Living like this!

It also makes me want to cry!

Crying won't solve the problem!

Society is like this!

I don't believe in anything!

Distribution according to needs!

There's definitely no such day!

Humans are humans!

Not gods!

I should have realized this earlier!

Actually, there is something!

It's unequal to begin with!

Take my own experience as an example!

Otherwise, I'll always feel that someone is talking about!

I'm fabricating facts about the underworld!

Actually, isn't this obvious?

What education fairness!

That's enough!

The school has to be divided into levels!

What is it!

Level 1!

Provincial level 1!

City level 1!

I'm not spouting nonsense!

Level 1 is the first batch!

Level 2 is dropped!

This is the so-called education fairness!

Even if there is such a fact!

I still think it's fair!

Sigh, I've been deeply poisoned!

Let's talk about it in detail!

It's none of my business!

There are thousands of students!

They've all been like this!

They don't have any opinions!

What do I have to say!

This is the problem!

Why doesn't anyone point it out directly!

They only say that there's a problem with education!

They don't say it directly!

I was poisoned!

I don't even have the ability to hate!

How should I put it!

I'm taking medicine!

I don't have any emotions!

I only know how to judge things as they are!

What education resources equalization!

You're lying to dogs!

I have nothing to say!

No one has any opinions!

What do I have to say?!

Just think about it and I know it's impossible!

I have nothing to say!

When everyone had their own opinions!

It's too late!

However!

These things are hard to say!

I feel like crying just thinking about it!

Sigh!

Life is like this!

Every country is like this!

I know just by thinking about it!

Don't say it!

A certain country is very good!

That's lying to myself!

How should I put it!

I should still do something!

First of all!

I have to maintain my own vitality!

Then I have to persevere in writing!

Expose the reality!

Of course, I know!

It's limited!

This is society!

I don't understand it now!

I can't accept it!

I thought society is good!

Sigh!

I'm too naive!

Too stupid!

That's why!

I have a flaw in my character!

It's the same no matter who comes!

Don't make yourself sound so great!

Look down on others!

I don't know anything about politics or economics!

I only know how to eat and sleep!

You know all that!

What's the use!

This can't be concealed!

Your ugly side as an exploiter!

Some things are hard to change!

This is society!

This is survival!

Civilization!

I'm civilized!

Deeply influenced!

I yearn for that kind of world!

I always feel high and mighty!

That's wrong!

I'm like that now!

I think I'm great just because I'm a bullsh * t writer!

What's the use!

Who do you think you are!

This kind of thinking is extreme!

Wrong!

It must be corrected!

I always feel that I'm superior to others!

That's not self-confidence!

That's hypocrisy!

I have such a problem too!

Continue!

That's it!

How should I put it!

It can't be!

Sigh, this is reality!

Perhaps this is a biological instinct!

But reality isn't like that!

No one pays!

Nothing will!

Work!

Money is useless!

No one maintains it!

It's also toilet paper!

One piece!

So!

Don't think that you have money!

You have power!

You can do whatever you want!

I don't want to live that much!

I still have to do something!

That's it!

First of all!

I have to persist in creating!

In the past, there were many writers like me!

Now, there are people as straightforward as me!

There are fewer and fewer of them!

I still have to persist in creating!

Of course, this is useless!

This kind of superficial statement!

It won't do!

Exploiters are cruel!

Why do you say that!

Don't talk about how good society is!

I don't think so!

That's nonsense!

It's not realistic!

First of all!

Exploiters don't do anything!

They're still working hard!

Exploiters only coordinate work!

They try their best!

They enslave you!

Just like me!

I know there's a problem!

I don't know how to resist!

And I mistakenly think so!

These exploiters are doing a good job!

It's a harmonious society!

I'm too good at lying to myself!

I can't do anything!

I just want to finish my life in peace!

There's a problem with society!

Everyone has a responsibility!

I won't condone it!

Don't think that it's anyone's problem!

Society's ethos!

That's it!

Not good!

Exploiters are not good!

Exploiters eat and drink well!

This kind of thinking is wrong!

My father!

He said that he wants me to work for the country!

Bullsh * t!

He doesn't even know what a country is!

His thinking is probably just a formality!

What about bringing glory to the ancestors!

This kind of thinking is harmful!

The country belongs to the people!

I don't think it belongs to the exploiters!

However!

The people!

They haven't awakened!

They're still condoning the exploiters!

The exploiters are noble!

They're proud!

This is wrong!

It's none of my business!

People can stand it!

Why can't I!

I have an opinion!

Why can't I say it!

Didn't you say that I have the right to speak!

I'm exercising my right now!

How should I put it!

I didn't mention any names!

I've had enough!

Actually, it's the same no matter who it is!

People are people!

People have to survive!

Civilized society is like that!

Survival!

It's unchangeable!

But resources are limited!

This kind of thinking is just a formality!

It's completely harming me!

Actually, people have to live!

I have a backbone!

It's no big deal!

I'm just afraid of this and that!

I don't care anymore!

Many people are like that!

I'll be like that in the future too!

Who asked me to have no sovereignty!

Serves me right!

There's only one choice!

Either be an exploiter!

Or be exploited!

It's that simple!

Maybe you'll think!

What I said is wrong!

Then explain it yourself!

I'll be like that for the rest of my life!

Alright?!

That's the same!

Too much!

Actually, it's the same for everyone!

There's no eternal exploiter!

There's only eternal benefit!

Otherwise, so many people will fall!

Who knows!

It's not like I haven't watched TV dramas!

People die every day in TV dramas!

There's no death!

Damn!

This is a conflicting emotion!

No way!

Why!

This doesn't feel good!

Sigh!

Don't I have a choice!

Freedom of belief!

As long as I don't harm others!

My belief is freedom!

But that's impossible!

It's not that good!

You're also lying to yourself!

Anyway, it's this lifetime!

Live one day at a time!

I've talked to the family of a mentally ill person before!

Her mother is mentally ill!

So I started talking to her!

We talked about work and life!

Normal people can still accept it!

Live one day at a time!

This kind of life!

This is what I yearn for!

I'm too muddle-headed!

I have this kind of feeling!

I didn't realize it!

How long can I live!

I thought I won't die!

I want to become an immortal!

So!

I'm mentally ill!

Bullshit!

I might as well live one day at a time!

This kind of spirit is worth learning from!

Live one more day and earn one more day!

Write one more day!

I'm just too muddle-headed!

So!

My little bit of consciousness!

I'm still not as good as normal people!

I'm not asking you to give up on life!

I'm asking you to fight for time!

I'm muddle-headed!

Time passes quickly!

That's it!

I'll go over now!

Twenty years!

I definitely won't think like her!

I'm mentally ill!

Taking medicine!

My dream!

Is to save the world!

I'm a person with aspirations!

Of course, reality is cruel!

I might not even have food!

I have food!

That's the situation!

I can suffer!

Even if I die, it's useless!

It won't be of much use!

That's it!

Mm!

This road is still very long!

Maybe I don't know how long I'll write!

But I still have to fight for it!

Maybe I won't always love writing novels!

Maybe!

I won't last long!

I won't be able to write anymore!

It's not impossible!

I have to cherish it!

That's it!

That's it!

I finally understand it!

Damn!

Writing like this won't be of much use!

It's only for children!

Damn!

To prevent schizophrenia!

First, I have to see!

A person's mental illness!

Don't be afraid even if you have a mental illness!

Mental illness isn't shameful!

But I feel a little like that!

That's why I feel terrible!

I feel like someone is targeting me!

That's an extreme mistake in thinking!

It's very difficult to correct!

If it's that easy!

Everyone can do it!

Typing!

Treating it as home!

I still want to experience life more!

That's it!

Continue!

I lack the spirit to do things!

My thinking is also extremely wrong!

I feel that I'm high and mighty, okay!

That's the problem!

It's easy to confuse this with confidence!

It's a feeling!

I feel that I'm different!

But!

Someone like me!

I've seen it before!

I'm not the first mentally ill person!

A writer!

I'm not the last either!

I'm only passing on my legacy!

But the works of these guys!

I was before!

I didn't read it!

It was only later!

I read it!

I saw it long ago!

I might not be mentally ill!