Today was May 11, 2015, Monday.

It was school time again. How I missed the feeling of going to school!

Although it wasn't good enough, I was still working hard!

It was almost 9 o 'clock. I was too tired last night and my feet hurt!

I was busy with the novel contract again!

If I were to sign a contract for my novel, I wouldn't even sign it as an editor. I just wanted to get some full attendance!

I didn't write a small 200 for nothing!

I could accompany you to eat and sleep!

Not for a year or two, but for a day or two. Because every day felt like the first love!

I should just focus on writing!

To be able to write a decent piece of work, that's also my goal!

Some people said I would flop, but I couldn't say for sure!

Everything was unpredictable. I could only take it one day at a time!

That's right, I could only do that. Writing for three years was just a plan. Plans could never keep up with changes!

In this turbulent era, there was a storm brewing!

Without an unyielding personality, it would be difficult to gain a foothold!

I have to speed up my writing. I won't get paid for such updates!

I should work hard for the dream in my heart!

It's good to earn some internet fees!

Although it's very difficult!

I still have to persevere!

The most important thing is to save up for a month's worth of chapters!

Only then will I have a chance to get full attendance!

Money isn't easy to earn!

I only realized after writing the novel!

Let's not talk about this. It's so serious early in the morning!

This chapter might be uploaded a little late!

It will be too late even if I think about it!

It's not a warm update!

But it's warm enough!

Do you still remember me?

I was enlightened. Perhaps no one has heard of me now!

It will be the same in the future!

It's useless to talk about this!

In my dictionary, there are no words!

I speak other people's language and eat other people's food. That's enough.

Every word I say is learned from other people!

There's no originality!

I still have to rely on myself!

Language, otherwise, I have to follow the crowd!

The weather is so good!

Why aren't you singing!

In this colorful world, there's a lost me.

I don't want to follow the crowd!

But I've been following!

The air is so suffocating that I can't breathe!

Maybe I'm too repressed. I shouldn't force myself!

I'm writing with the crowd's language and plot!

I'm a writer who follows the crowd!

I was born with the feeling that following the crowd isn't good!

On this point, you're following the crowd again!

It was as if the novels were written by the same person!

They were all so brainless. Although they were good-looking, they couldn't feel that faint sadness!

However, it was as if he had typed out a few words!

I'll do whatever I want!

What did I do?

Actually, that's what I wrote too!

However, due to his physical condition, it wasn't as realistic as what was written!

There was no point in looking at that kind of stuff!

Reality wasn't like that!

I read all kinds of novels. As long as it's something I can read, I'll read it!

I feel like they were written from the same mold!

It was too smooth. Only the setting had changed, and the plot was mostly melodramatic!

This was not good, there was no feeling of a hundred flowers blooming together!

However, I feel that writing like that is fine. Writing like mine is not good. I'm complaining every day!

There was no story, no central idea!

Forget it, I'll just focus on writing my piece first. I'm not a critic, so it's none of my business. It's not like I need to read it if it's not good!

I just occasionally look at some of the works.

I'll look at the latest updates and see what kind of authors have appeared!

This was the kind of novel I read. There were some novels that I didn't want to read after one or two chapters. They were all the same. Just like He Qizheng, Jia Duo Bao, and Wang Laoji, they were all the same!

How could there be no innovation!

A few years ago, you were chopping pigweed. Now, you're still chopping pigweed. This was what my primary school teacher, Teacher Xu, taught us!

There was no change!

I'd better not complain. You're not a pigweed chopper either!

That's enough!

You're all writing the same thing!

Chopping pigweed can also be addictive!

Let's not talk about these unpleasant things, in case it acts up again!

When it acts up, you'll blame yourself and scold others, saying that you're guilty!

I think you're really guilty too!

How can you scold others!

How can you scold others!

This is your fault. Take care of yourself first!

You have no right to ask. Others are the same as you. Others have other choices!

Don't think that you're great. Everyone is great!

That's what I said. I always feel like I'm better than others. This way of thinking is very low-class!

This is a wrong way of thinking!

This is a free society!

Everyone is equal!

Your teacher didn't teach you that!

I seem to have seen it myself. It's in the books!

This way of thinking is even more wrong. Aren't you a fellow who doesn't love learning!

You're like a jumping dog, writing novels every day!

I need to find a reason to let me live a worry-free life!

I can learn whatever I want to learn!

But you've made a mistake in your thinking!

That's where you're wrong!

Students learn to live!

This is what a student is!

I've studied for so many years, but only now do I know that students learn to live!

Are my teachers all brick-moving?

I'm still an undergraduate student. I don't even know what a student does!

I'm ashamed!

Blame me for being too stupid. It's useless to say that I'm stupid. It's useless to give up!

What you should do is to persevere!

Work hard and write a good life!

But I remember that my teacher told us to serve our country and even made an oath!

Our entire school made an oath!

I've forgotten how it was said!

I've already forgotten. I only remembered it now. How many people can remember it!

These people will eventually be forgotten by history!

Being alive was like being dead!

I just want to scold you. Hit me!

I'm not a good person either!

I actually have the so-called reactionary emotions!

This kind of thinking is unacceptable!

Although I didn't even join the Communist Youth League!

I feel that I'm not worthy of joining the Communist Youth League!

I don't have the ability. I don't have such good ideological awareness!

I don't want to insult the Communist Youth League. Even mentally ill people can join!

But I'm really guilty!

I don't even have this little bit of ideological awareness and self-awareness!

Why should I write novels!

These aren't the main points!

Self-reflection!

My thinking isn't advanced enough. I'm far behind. My self-thinking is deeply rooted!

The specific manifestations are as follows!

I'm not decisive enough in doing things. I'm timid!

Due to my indecisiveness, I even shrink back!

I like to retreat from everything!

I'm not proactive!

I'm not progressive.

The collective manifestations are as follows:

I wake up late and sleep early!

I'm not good at my studies. I'm a loafer. I don't deeply implement the spirit of the Communist Youth League!

These aren't my main crimes!

There's also:

As a middle school student, I'm heavily involved in pornography!

I've watched a large number of inappropriate videos and books for a long time!

And I have bad intentions towards female students!

What's more infuriating is that I even want to pursue female teachers!

This is a serious violation of the middle school student code of conduct!

It's even illegal!

This is just a small part. My unbearability is just the tip of the iceberg!

My thinking is backward and negative.

It contains the so-called rebellious thoughts!

I always have a feeling of being persecuted by others. I always feel that the world is unfair!

This is a big mistake!

This is a big taboo for an advanced youth!

These are the main mistakes!

I hope the people can forgive me!

I hope the people can forgive my evil deeds!

I will definitely correct them!

I won't make any more ideological mistakes!

Next, I'll go one step further and tell you about my mistakes!

My official thinking is serious. This is the biggest mistake!

I discriminated against my classmates and felt that they were unbearable!

My self-awareness is too strong!

My mentality is twisted!

It's already perverted!

This is my self-reflection on why I didn't join the Communist Youth League. Although it's not deep enough, it's enough!

I hope the people can forgive me!

Forgive me!

I've already realized my serious mistakes!

I hope I can change them in the days to come!

I feel that you're alive, but it's like you're dead!

I feel that you're not enough!

You're a dead man!

If you want to be, then be a real man with unyielding bones!

You're too much!

I'm not at that level!

I can't keep up with the progress of the times!

I'm not a human. I'm just a silly dog. As a silly dog, I should work harder!

Work hard to become an adult!

The atmosphere is very serious now!

What are you saying? Shut up! At this solemn moment!

A piece of trash like you, that's enough!

I swear again!

I swear!

As a youth of the new era!

I should be strong, independent, and confident!

Work hard!

Bear hardships!

Work hard to maintain the order of the law!

Know the law, understand the law, use it, but don't break the law!

Work hard to add bricks and tiles to the socialist modernization of our country!

Love peace!

Insist on freedom, equality, and harmony!

I swear!

This is the first time I've made a conscious oath!

I'll do what I say ~!

The previous oaths were just for show. I didn't have a deep understanding and implementation!

In the days to come, I'll be considered a good citizen. I've already made an oath!

I won't be emotional anymore!

I'll just reflect on the problem. I'll try to be less emotional. If I'm emotional, I'll cause a big mess!

I need to be rational and emotional to look at the problem and deal with the problem!

I can't be passive and avoid it!

I should be proactive in dealing with the problem!

Although I'm not a hot-blooded youth, I'm just a bit melodramatic!

What I need to do is to write good novels, go to work, and make a living!

The world is so complicated. How can I do it!

In this world, I'm completely finished. I don't have much awareness in my thinking!

I'm even weaker in terms of ability!

I blame this and that every day!

I don't realize the root of the problem!

I don't find the root of the problem. Societal problems are all derived from personal problems. Raising awareness is the root!

I've already been in school for 16 or 17 years, but I still don't understand. Do you think this education is good?

Education is to let the majority of people understand these principles!

It's also a failure!

I'm just a novelist, yet I don't understand!

It's still the same sentence. Societal problems are all derived from personal problems!

This sentence is not wrong at all!

If society is not harmonious, it's a personal problem that hasn't been solved. Education is a big problem!

Of course, self-awareness is also very important. Education is the key factor!

Self-awareness is the root!

I can directly say that societal problems are personal problems!

I'm that straightforward. My personal problems are also very serious!

Of course, I'm not saying that this society is bad. I just feel that there are some areas that are not satisfactory!

The key task now is to develop production!

The key was to make a big deal out of education!

Work hard to raise awareness among the people. The people should also have a certain level of awareness!

This is the essence of communism!

I'm not some country's leader. My words are worthless. If you think so, you should reflect on your own problems!

Maybe I'm wrong!

I hope so!

It's good that reality is like this. I hope that I'm the only one who has made a mistake in my thinking. Not many people are making it!

It's all my fault!

This thinking is too negative. I don't dare to face the pain of life!

I have to emphasize!

I've always been a cowardly person!

The new society needs everyone to work together. The so-called law can only guard against gentlemen, not villains!

I won't give an example. Look at the news!

Societal problems are personal problems!

If you want to really develop!

One or two people, just a few people with the awareness of being officials, won't do!

Everyone's awareness is the root!

These are all in the Grade 1 politics books. The books are more subtle!

I've also studied politics before!

Although I might not be able to participate in politics in this lifetime!

I've always been participating!

Thinking needs to have awareness!

I should do what I swore. It's much better than participating in politics!

I won't say too much!

Otherwise, it will be against the rules!